In literary criticism, a bildungsroman is a literary genre that focuses on the psychological and moral growth and change of the protagonist from childhood to adulthood. The term comes from the German words Bildung (‘formation’ or ‘education’) and Roman (novel). We call these types of narratives a coming-of-age story and they resonate deeply with us because they explore universal themes of growth, identity, and self-discovery. They capture the emotional struggles, triumphs, and transitions that everyone experiences at some point in life.
If you love literature and have not yet treated yourself to Benjamin Myers’ book, The Offing you are in for a literary delight. We meet our protagonist, Robert Appleyard one summer in the aftermath of the second world war. In “an act of escapology and rebellion” he leaves his Durham colliery village to search for any work that isn’t coal mining. On the east coast he meets the lobster eating, hard-drinking, foul-mouthed aesthete, Dulcie along with her loyal German Shepherd, Butler. They form an unlikely but symbiotic triad, in which he gardens while she provides food, shelter and intellectual sustenance and Bulter care takes them both. So begins the transformation of young Robert Appleyard from a working-class boy with a small view of the world who migrates his identity into a young man with academic ambitions and a greater sense of hope for what his future could be.
The Offing is a sublime example of the ‘Coming of Age’ novel, like Great Expectations, Little Women, The Catcher in the Rye or The Perks of Being a Wallflower. All the main characters of these stories migrate their identity into a boarder sense of self through new experiences. This is similar to how someone in therapy or counselling expands their identity through reflection and re-authoring. The natural order of life propels us forward and we are required to grow up, launch our lives and become the person we are meant to be. All good and well if you know what you have to do to grow up, how to launch a life into adulthood and what you want to be in the world. So many of us don’t know how or what to do when it is time to grow up or transition from one thing to another.
In narrative practice we often refer to the migration of identity, and like coming-of-age stories they have 5 key characteristics.
1. Both Involve a Shift from an Old Self to a New Self
Migration of Identity: In narrative therapy, migration of identity refers to moving away from a dominant, often limiting self-story (e.g., "I'm not capable," "I don’t belong") to a preferred, more empowering identity.
Coming of Age: A protagonist in a coming-of-age story begins with a limited understanding of themselves but, through experience, transitions into a new, more mature identity.
For example, a teen in a coming-of-age novel may start feeling powerless or uncertain (e.g., Holden Caulfield in The Catcher in the Rye), just as someone in therapy may feel stuck in a limiting story. Over time, they both rewrite their narrative to reflect new growth and understanding.
2. Both Require Facing Challenges & Rewriting One’s Story
Migration of Identity: People can challenge dominant stories that restrict them (e.g., "I’m not smart enough," "I will never succeed") and instead find alternative stories that showcase resilience and strength.
Coming of Age: The protagonist must face adversity (love, loss, failure, independence) to rewrite how they see themselves and their future.
For example, in The Offing by Ben Myers, Robert begins as a working-class boy with a small view of the world but "migrates" into a broader sense of self through new experiences—similar to how someone in therapy expands their identity through reflection and re-authoring.
3. Both Involve Externalising the Old Story & Embracing a New Narrative
Migration of Identity: Narrative therapy encourages externalising limiting beliefs (“The fear of failure is not me; it is something I have learned”) and stepping into a new, chosen identity.
Coming of Age: The protagonist outgrows past fears and limitations, often breaking free from societal, familial, or internalised expectations to step into a stronger, clearer sense of self.
For example, in To Kill a Mockingbird, Scout Finch starts as a naive child but gains a deeper, more complex understanding of morality and justice. Similarly, in therapy, someone might move from an oversimplified self-view to a richer, more empowering identity.
4. Both Are Rooted in Agency & Choice
Migration of Identity: The person in therapy chooses a new identity based on strengths, values, and possibilities, rather than remaining stuck in an inherited narrative.
Coming of Age: The protagonist takes control of their story, often making a defining choice that marks their shift into adulthood or self-realisation.
For example, in The Perks of Being a Wallflower, Charlie moves from passively observing life to actively choosing to participate, similar to how a person in narrative therapy begins to take ownership of their evolving identity.
5. Both Emphasise Reflection & Meaning-Making
Migration of Identity: Narrative therapy helps people reflect on experiences differently - instead of seeing failures or hardships as proof of weakness, they reframe them as evidence of resilience and growth.
Coming of Age: The protagonist often looks back on their past self with new understanding, seeing how experiences have shaped their identity.
For example, a character like Pip in Great Expectations or Jay Gatsby in The Great Gatsby looks back on their past and sees how their story has shifted - much like someone in therapy recognises their own growth.
Coming-of-age stories mirror the process of migration of identity in real life. Both involve:
Letting go of old, limiting beliefs
Facing challenges that redefine our self-understanding
Finding new, preferred ways of seeing ourselves
Rewriting the narrative into one of growth, empowerment, and possibility
In many ways, every coming-of-age story is an example of identity migration - a movement toward a new, more self-aware way of being.
A great activity you can do to help yourself move through a migration of identity is a to write a letter to your future self. This kind of activity can affirm your identity, ignite hope, and help you step more intentionally into the story you want to live or think you should be living. Have a look at our free template ‘A Letter to Your Future Self’ and complete the activity.
If you’d like to explore your life stories in more detail or begin a journey of reinvention, why not reach out to Made Better Human. We offer a comprehensive program, Made Better Stories which guides you through an approach you can take to unfold new meaning and perspective on your life stories. Or you might like to work with one of our narrative therapists / coaches who can offer one-on-one coaching that will support you as you work through your stories and the re-authoring process. Contact us here.